Friday, January 23, 2009

Deep Thoughts, by MammaDucky

Tomorrow is my 28th birthday. My Mom and I actually share a birthday. We were chatting yesterday (as we do EVERY day) and she was telling me how she was 29 when she had me and 34 when she had my youngest sibling (Hi Jenny!!). Got me thinkin'. I want one more child. You know, to even things out. I'm slightly OCD about things being even. I'm not talking being even gender wise, I'm talking numbers. I want 4 kids. Always have, always will. That being said, I'm not ready for #4 just yet.
I figure by the time Pickles makes it to kinder garden would be good for me The Dude's thoughts on this subject are ever so slightly different from mine. Ok, that's a lie, he says we're done having kids...silly man. Little math here: that should make me about 32 when he starts school. As we all know, or actually I think some people DON'T know, makin' babies can take time. 18 months is considered a "normal" amount of time that it can take to get pregnant. So I'm looking at being 33 or 34 before getting pregnant again! Aack!
Can I handle that? My body will be older and things will be more difficult. Don't get me wrong, I absolutely love being pregnant. Yep, I'm one of those weird ones. Even with my difficult/high risk pregnancies, I loved every minute of it. But will I be able to work full time, run 3 kids to school AND handle a pregnancy, let alone new baby? Scary.
I kinda see this as a growing issue. People are waiting longer and longer to have babies. Everyone assumes that you just decide to get pregnant and it happens right away. SOOOOO not the case for many many people. Before we got pregnant for the twinkies we had been trying since we got married (married in 02, girls were born in 05). We charted, took herbal supplements, saw doctors, all kinds of things. It just took time. Granted, getting pregnant with Pickles did "just happen," but that isn't always the case.
Where am I going with this? I don't know exactly. We have lots of friends that are just getting married or are newly married. They're all either already in their 30s or pushing 30. They ALL say that they want to wait a few years before having kids. PEOPLE, listen to MammaDucky, time is ticking away. Do you want to be starting your family in your mid to late 30's (or later??)? Yes, I know many people have children well into their 40s. My hat is off to you. I don't know how you do it.
I think by the time I get to my 40's I want to be getting into that phase where my kids are grown and I can chillax more. This is an odd rant and I realize it doesn't really go with the style of my blog. I guess it's too late to tell you to just skip this post if you don't want to hear my deep thoughts, eh?


Sassypants Wifey said...

You are a brave soul Mamma. There is no way I want to be in my 30's when my next kiddo comes. I want to be done-zo by the time I am 30. It will probably take me till my 40's just to get back in shape... Then late 40's the kiddos will be flying the coop and me and hubs will travel the country, hello Europe!

The Rambler said...

What if....

you have another set of twins? Then your back to the odd number of kids again :)

I'm a little panicked myself but I had my daughter at 30...and am 33 now. Will only have one more probably within the next 2 years. Will stop before I turn 36. Wish I was a little younger when I started, but part of me feels like I'm only 12 anyway. (which would be WAY young to have a kid...I'm rambling)

MammaDucky said...

Geezy-kreezy! More stress! Thanks. Actually, because my girls are identical, my chances of having more twins is the same as everyone there!
I'm glad you specified that 12 is way to young to have babies, lol.
WV: hyperse
as in: I'm not high, per se. He he he he he

The Blonde Duck said...

Holy crap. That would scare me!

Jenny Wegner said...

Well,,, different strokes, you know? I understand what you're saying, but I feel like I couldn't possibly imagine having children before, say, 28, at the absolute EARLIEST, whereas you couldn't imagine having kids as an older lady. Your friend who commented wants to go traveling once the kids are out, other folks want to travel when they're young and then raise kids when they're older. MANY of my friends' mothers didn't have their first babe until they were in their mid to late 30s (maybe it's a bay area trend?) and it worked out great. Also these tend to be 2 kid families whereas you want 4, so it's just different. I'd imagine that some of these friends of yours that are "pushin 30" and haven't started families yet already get plenty of flack about it from older family members so there's probably already stress regarding it. NEwayz, those are My Deep Thoughts on the subject :)

Sassypants Wifey said...

Ah, to be young and know everything! Its funny, when people wait and then only have 2 kids, could it be? They are too damn tired. Of course we wont have that problem when we are, by law, only allowed to have 2 per family, thanks to those in power. Nicely done. I love it! Really, its like when people know you are doing something wrong, though they have never done it. Cause really, KNOWING someone who has done it gives you the end all, be all, say all in how it works right? Of course it does. Different strokes though. Maybe I will be still having kids into my 30's. I love being a momma. I had a calling to be a mom I guess you could say. I am putting off law school to persue raising my kiddos. Let me tell you, I do not look forward to sitting in a class with a bunch of know it alls, who really only know things "through someone who knows someone". Should be fun eh?! Love ya Mama!