The Girly Exam

That lovely time of year had rolled around for me. Time to visit that cold room with the stirrups. Like any mature lady, I abstained from any food or beverage since 9pm the previous night....you know, to make sure I weigh the absolute LEAST upon stepping on the scale. This was a mistake. I need coffee in the morning. Whatever, it's for the greater good, right?

I got up extra early to ensure I had enough time to shower, blow dry and style my hair. I don't do this on normal days, but I have to present that look of the effortlessness it takes being a mom of three wee-ones. Stop laughing. I put on my dark jeans (dark colors = hides more flaws), my cute new sweet-heart neck sweater and some patent leather heels. Actually, I do wear those shoes a lot of days to work. Work is like dress up time for me.

Anyway, I stroll in a good 15 mins. early, and the stench of old lady perfume nearly knocked me down. For crying out loud! There are pregnant women in there! They should have a sign that says "No Stinkies" or something. Cripes. If I had been pregnant, I would have most certainly thrown up.

Back in THE room, I sit and wait. Covered by my oh-so-warm paper blanket. In pops my doc. Let me say this about him: all of the nurses have the hots for him. While he isn't drop dead gorgeous, he's got that something, ya know? Add to that, he has the most amazing bedside manner I've ever encountered and you've got a winner.

"Hey there. Gotta say, it's a little weird seeing you not pregnant." Good one doc. I lay back and ready myself for it.

Wait. What is that lovely image on the ceiling? How nice. An ocean scene to gaze at whilst in the stirrups. I suggest they swap it would with a word search, or Sudoku. He says they'll look into it. Yes, I whipped out the cell phone and snapped a pic.

On the way out, the head nurse tells me that they miss me around there. Perhaps I should look into having another...her words people, not mine.

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I know I'm a little late on the bandwagon here, but if you look to my sidebar, at the very top, you'll see a image about the "Wagie Ride" for Tuesday. We'll be participating by taking the kids for a wagon ride this Saturday. I urge you to do the same. Peace and comfort be with her family, especially Piper, her twin.